Uninspired

Its been a week. I've been uninspired at work and had issues with gaming.

You see, at work some friends began playing Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare at lunch time. I resisted the urge for a couple weeks to join in because I have notoriously bad hand to eye coordination and knew I would be at the bottom of the pack in these fast paced twitch reaction games. But a few others were also bad so I was convinced to join in.

Damn I had fun. Yeah I did suck but so did some of the other guys and I was able to feel at least slightly competitive. I got mini-addicted as I tend to do and bought the game on Steam and tried it at home, venturing into the online world of servers.

Enter the common refrain heard on this blog of lack of time for gaming and the result was that I forsook my Eve time for playing CoD for a couple nights. Hence this week's lack of posting.

However at work a few more people joined the lunch time shenanigans and these people were pros. The guys we thought were good in our little group were suddenly the average and I found myself the bottom of a bigger ladder. The cannon fodder if you will. From feeling slightly competitive to feeling lucky to get a single kill. Although my friend Andrew assures me that I'm as bad as I'm feeling, it is definitely disheartening.

Funny thing is, when I go online to public servers at home I don't feel as frustrated even though the quality of players is high there as well. I think the difference is the large populations on a map make me feel less singled out if that makes sense; I can hold back and get a few kills as the second or third man into a firefight as opposed to being headshot 5 times in a row in our lunchtime group.

Couple all that rollercoaster frustration with wanting to continue to play Eve and World of Tanks and having ever decreasing amounts of time to do so, and I am thoroughly uninspired. To further add to my angst, the twins are having their birthday party this Saturday so I will be busy getting that underway so no gaming time for most of the weekend.

There is no light at the end of the tunnel, its simply the train of life.